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Marina Cornish reviews As It Were by Jonathan Biggins
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Contents Category: Short Stories
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In this tongue-in-cheek version of world history, Jesus Christ was originally baby Warren, until a celebrity representative came knocking at the manger door to help spin Mary’s unlikely tale of immaculate conception. Jonathan Biggins has examined world events from an Australian perspective, from the dawn of time, when God beat out Satan as chairgod in a narrow recount, to the reign of the pioneering environmentalist Robin Hood, to a rather subdued meeting of the Millenium Doomsday Cult. Through the imposition of modern bureaucracy onto historical events, As It Were lambastes the red tape and political correctness that stifle modern society. We discover that the works of Dickens do not translate well to adaptation by magical lantern, since there are not enough prospects for sequels; Monet is blighted by the cost of absinthe, as the tax auditor refuses to allow it as a tool of trade, and the first run of Kitty Hawk is delayed while the Wright Brothers apply to occupy limited airspace.

Book 1 Title: As It Were
Book Author: Jonathan Biggins
Book 1 Biblio: ABC Books, $24.95 pb, 213 pp
Book 1 Author Type: Author
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The chronologically ordered chapters are an execution of impeccable timing; each is bite-sized, ending abruptly before the joke wears thin. The author toys with the lexicons of various eras to great comedic effect, particularly in ‘The Diary of Samuel Pepys’, a chapter devoted to the ad ventures of a fifteenth-century philanderer living in London. While ‘Space: The Final Chapter’ provides a sting in the tail with its portrayal of a doomed planet, the message of As It Were is not as dire as this; it is simply to remember to laugh at ourselves.

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